Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Crashing! And is that smoke I smell?

On Monday, feeling feverish and snotty, I called in sick to work. I don't remember the last time a virus has actually knocked me on my ass (thank you, vitamin D) but there it was.

I returned to my office and realized that all this time I had been just one day removed from complete chaos. The delicate balance, the bargaining and trading of one deadline for another, it had all been upended by one day at home.

There is too much work to accomplish in the hours I have every day that are free of meetings. And every meeting generates more work. I'm in time debt, speeding toward bankruptcy, with no way out.

At that realization, I was overcome by a state of complete mental paralysis.

I closed my door and spent four minutes indulging in an episode of panic. I know it was four minutes because I looked at the clock. Because it felt like four hours.


Heather said...

take a deep breath and just know that it will get done, maybe not all before the deadlines.

Anonymous said...

Why do you oppose the will of Allah? Surely the blood of the prophet flows in your veins. Remember that Muhammed; he is all merciful and all praise be unto his name, has dropped a peach in your lap.
The baqarah is with you! Rejoice in his holy will and we will all eat lamb in paradise
-Mahatma Khoat

Anonymous said...

ahhh, yeessss, i know this feeling, little one. i call it TLP--target lock paralysis. tooomannnytarrrgetses