Tuesday, September 20, 2005

A couple of things.

First, I really should drink more water. And so should you.

Also, there is a blood drive this week at work and every time this happens I have to have the same argument with myself.

Me: We should give blood. It's the right thing to do. People need blood.

Me2: We've been through this. Let me walk you through what will happen. We'll dutifully fill out all of the paperwork, secretly feeling a bit sad that we've skirted in above the weight cutoff. They'll prick our finger and determine that we have plenty of iron. And then we'll recline on a gurney, squeeze a ball, and try to present veins.

Me: Yes! And then we'll give blood.

Me2: No, we will not. We'll try to pretend we're strolling the streets of Paris while the nurse pokes around for a vein. Then a good ten or fifteen minutes and several dozen puncture wounds later, the nurse will shout Eureka! and we'll see a stream of red fill the tube and travel its merry way to the collection bag.

Me: Exactly! So what's a little discomfort when the tradeoff is helping someone in need? Let's do it.

Me2: You're obviously forgetting what happens every time we're about three-quarters of the way to a pint.

Me: Um…?

Me2: Nothing. Nothing happens! Blood completely stops flowing and no amount of needle jiggling, ball squeezing, or silent pleading will get it going again. The nurse detaches the bag, pats our arm condescendingly, and mutters something about maybe using our blood for plasma when we both know perfectly well it's just going to be tossed.

Me: Oh. Yeah. But at least there are donuts?

Me2: You want a donut that badly? I will freaking buy you a donut. Loser.

5 comments:

red fish said...

You should not feel guilty for not donating. There are plenty of people who can easily donate who don't that should feel guilty. It's great that you have tried, but if you can't, you can't. Going when you know it won't work just wastes their time and yours. I've worked in a blood bank and recruited for blood drives, and if people had more than one bad experience, especially if it was the same situation more than once, I told them not to bother. If you really want to help the cause, you can ask them if there are other ways you can help, like hanging posters or baking cookies. Buy yourself the donut without guilt.

landismom said...

I agree with red fish. I am a somewhat difficult stick, and it makes it extremely unpleasant to give blood. There are other ways to help that don't cause you physical pain.

Deborah said...

And besides, aren't you worried that they'll keep some of your blood, clone you, and use your clone (or clones) for nefarious purposes?

Or is that just me?

Squeaky Weasel said...

er... I am now.

Daethian said...

Hello non blood giving twin!

We are vein sisters... I have the same issues. The yearly blood draw for work is a huge issue. This year they weren't able to get enough the first time and no vein period the second time. They actually wanted to stick my FOOT. Oh hell no...